Yo!! Sweetness.

I was checking this out recently, and I got to thinking about some of the worse album covers from other years. By that I don't necessarily mean album covers that are just completely bizarre and obscure (but admittedly hilarious), rather albums that are actually relatively well known, by popular or respected artists. Some of the main offenders here seem to be rappers; older albums often have strange and ridiculous fashions on display, while some of the more recent efforts from the Wu Tang are pretty 'orribly designed, even if the contents are often excellent (unlike with the pitchfork article above, which seems to be suggesting that the artists who make or commission bad album art are necessarily bad musicians). So I guess you can't judge a CD by its cover (even if you can usually judge a book by its cover). Anyways, here's a few for your consideration, in no particular order:

Inspectah Deck - Uncontrolled Substance (1999):



A good album ("my style's so underground I write rhymes on fossils"), awful art. Inspectah looks like he's dressed as a bin man, and he's pulling a very awkward pose. The movement lines around the car suggest it's driving past him, and yet there's a dog leaning on it barking. Also, check the awful pic art magnifying glass, the bad font, and the awkward and unnecessary use of the Wu's "W" symbol, which is a recurring theme in Wu Tang solo albums.

Method Man - Tical 0: The Prequel (2004):



Extremely confusing and cluttered. Is the baby flying? Has it been dropped? It looks in pain anyway. More awkward "W" usage, this time it's been turned upside down. (Edit - just realised that it's a giant baby, wrecking a city)

GZA - Beneath the Surface (1999):



Another Wu Tang. Not sure what it is about this one that gets on my nerves; I think it just looks like a poorly made PC game from the late nineties, some sort of space related strategy game, but I can't really put my finger on it. The idea of imprinting a massive "G" on the world is a nice metaphor, but it looks rubbish in execution. Also, the "Parental Guidance" symbol is far too big, and it's guilty again of "W" manipulation. It's strange, because Liquid Swords has one of the coolest Wu covers, and yet this one is rubbish - perhaps he went to a different guy for Liquid Swords, and reverted back to the same crappy graphic artist that all of Wu seem to be friends with for this one.

GZA - Legend of the Liquid Sword (2002):



Pretty much the same deal as above, looks like a bad 90s PC game, except this one reminds me of this also:



GZA and the person he's with have been badly pasted behind that console they're looking at, so it seems as if they are just disembodied torsos without legs, just floating there above it.

Wu-Tang Clan - 8 Diagrams (2007):



Mortal Kombat.

Bob Dylan - Self Portrait (1970):



This one is pretty famously bad. Created by Bob himself, I guess by this point he was surrounded by sycophants and yes men who didn't bother to tell him he couldn't paint.

David Bowie - Earthling (1997):



I'm afraid to listen to this, because it contains the infamous drum and bass track he did. I'm sure I'm not missing very much, late Bowie tends to be pretty dull, but he's certainly not doing himself any favours by dressing up as Geri Haliwell's dad on the front cover.

Bobby Womack - The Poet II (1984):



Apparently tired of being of his image as a sexy sounding soul singer with big glasses, Bobby Womack decided to up his game in the mid 80s by dressing in pink leather. This seems to be part of a trend with soul and funk singers, who in trying to appear sensual and sensitive, sometimes cross the line into flaming homosexuality. I actually found this album in Groucho's once, but, perhaps unsurprisingly, I didn't buy it.

Isaac Hayes - Joy (1973):



Same as the description for The Poet II, although it's worth noting the tiny Isaac jumping for "joy" above his name in a nice ballet pose, as well as the back cover for this album:



How can someone wearing that have such a manly pose? Because he's Isaac Hayes.

MC Hammer - Please Hammer, Don't Hurt 'Em (1990):



Bad cover, terrible (although unintentionally hilarious) title. This one runs against my "don't judge a CD..." comment somewhat.

Kool Moe Dee - How Ya Like Me Now (1987):



This is one of the few bad album covers that is both completely horrible and completely awesome at the same time. My brain is swinging between the opinions so quickly that it's making me feel sick. Kool Moe Dee famously feuded with this guy:

LL Cool J - Walking Like a Panther (1989):



This one is more baffling than anything else. How were they allowed to do this? Does the purchaser/listener really need to be shown a panther in a gold chain in order to understand where LL is coming from here? Also, is it just me, or does that panther actually seem to be somewhat weighed down by the chain? It looks like his head is drooping. And what does that briefcase with the handcuffs have to do with anything?

Anyway, that's enough for now, but I might come back to this. I found some of these just as I was writing this blog, like the Panther one, so I guess there are probably an awful lot more out there than I'm aware.

On a side note, hope everyone is having a good Christmas.